Human Search Engines....

Wikipedia defines a human search engine as:
"..a search engine that utilizes human participation to filter the search results and assist users in clarifying their search request. The goal is to provide users with a limited number of relevant results, as opposed to traditional search engines that often return a large number of results that may or may not be relevant."

Some examples of human search engines:

Bessed - built on a blogging platform
ChaCha - Cha means "search" in Chinese
Mahalo - according to their site, "search results only include great links"

Apparently, when search engines use humans to index pages, the results are more relevant. I can't say that I have tried any of them extensively, but maybe next time you are frustrated with Google, these are some alternatives.


I don't think Ms. Dewey is a human powered search engine, but check out the intro. It is powered by Microsoft Live Search. Also, if you are idle for 30 seconds or so, she yells at you. She's actually quite a character...hit the Best of Dewey button and she will probably put on a little show...

And the Horrible Pie Chart Truth Will Set You Free

Alternate title: Save Money, Lose Weight, Play More Video Games

After playing with Mint for a few weeks, and fixing some of the (few) mis-labeled transactions, 2 things became abundantly clear:

1. Owning and improving a home in the DC area is expensive as balls.


2. I am spending enough money on fast food and coffee to lease a Kia.

The home improvement isn't that troubling, assuming anyone ever buys or sells a house again. Ever.

But the fast food spending is killing me (quite literally) in several ways. First, there are many better ways to utilize $310/month than Panda Express and Starbucks. Second (and I haven't done the legwork on this) I suspect there are healthier dining options extant.

Enter the magic of the internets. Starting Columbus day (no time to grocery shop before then) I will harness the self-improvement (and waist-line reducing) power of Joe's Goals, ING Direct, and self-loathing to banish fastfood and Starbucks from my (weekday) life. This should help me save money (for to pay off credit cards and buy a 40GB Playstation 3) and bring sexy back.

I typically spend ~$5 on breakfast/coffee and $10 on fastfood lunch and dinner. My thinking is that I can replace $125/week of fastfood with ~$50 of groceries, saving $75/week. Tracking my (hopefully) good behavior on Joe's Goals, I plan on dumping the first $35/saved each week into a no-fun ING account that will go towards credit cards. The other (possible) $40 will go to fun.

I'll check back in a month and let you know how it's going. If you don't hear from me, I'm probably at Pentagon City mall gorging myself on Kung Pao and Orange Chicken.

Two headed turtle...

...has been purchased by a pet store in Pennsylvania; Big Al's Aquarium Supercenter in East Norriton. Oddly enough, I just saw this story on ESPN's First Take.

The turtle is apparently healthy and can live 15 to 20 years.

The little guy(s)/gal(s) has two sets of front feet, but only one set of back feet.

The turtle is a red-eared slider and can fit on a silver dollar. Quite small...

Link to the story:
LINK

Link to Big Al's website and address (in case you want to go see it):
Web Site - Address

Learn the internet from Kim Jong Il...

Apparently, everyone's favorite dictator, Kim Jong Il has proclaimed himself an "internet expert", according to Engaget.
He made this admission during talks with South Korean President, Roh Moo-hyun.

I'm convinced.

I wonder if he has a blog with tips on the internet....oh wait, The Economist once said that the "Chinese web which, for all its no-go areas, is a paradise of liberty compared with Kwangmyong" (Kwangmyong being the North Korean intranet). What does that tell you about internet access in North Korea?

"Hans Blix! I'm very busy man!"

BEST Halloween costume involving poop...

Boing Boing calls this the worst costume ever, but they are wrong.
Poopie Shorts! Just read the description:
"Two-Layer Butt Allows 'Diarrhea' to Flow without a Mess!"

Comes with "Theatrical Liquid 'Diarrhea'"!!

Maybe I could use this costume for more than one year.....

Here's a link to 10 Halloween Costumes That Are Just Sick and Wrong, where this comes from....

PT Cruiser - Day 3 - It is actually smarter than me....

No, I haven't figured out why the alarm goes off every time I unlock and open the door.
But, it does have Sirius satellite radio. I accidentally pushed a button while trying to turn up the volume and found out. I could have been imagining a fat whip (since I don't have to see the outside while driving) while listening to good tunes.
Boy, do I feel dumb....

PT Cruiser, please accept my humble apology.

Covestor now has $100 million worth of brokerage accounts...

....Zach and I are a small fraction of it.

TechCrunch highlights that Covestor users have a combined amount of $100 million in brokerage accounts.
We have previously highlighted Covestor (link to tagged posts) and just figured I would mention it since it seems to be a growing phenomenon.

As opposed to being a fantasy stock site that doesn't use real money, this site shows if you really can't spell stock or market...


And yes, the A/C unit on top of the car has nothing to do with the post...

Even Though I Plan on Voting For Her...

...I think the Hillary Nutcracker is pretty funny. Yours for the low-low price of $19.95.

Wal-Mart's employees drink haterade...

Haterade is defined by UrbanDictionary.com as, "a figurative drink representing a modality of thought. those who consume it are themselves consumed by the negativity which with they speak."

A recent article in BusinessWeek, as highlighted HERE by BloggingStocks.com, points out that Wal-Mart employees are extremely bitter towards their employer. Because of this resentfulness, employees treat customers like poop.
Some have suggested that Wal-Mart stop trying to up their rankings in the list of the World's Billionaires and actually treat their employees better.

My question is, will this actually encourage people who refuse to shop at Wal-Mart to become patrons?

People who currently hate Wal-Mart (i.e. Electronic Vagrant), probably have reasons other than bad customer service. How many people were so upset by their customer experience that they never went back? Humans are inherently cheap. So, they probably continue to shop there and just accept the fact that if they can't find something, they may be cursed at by the employee who "don't work in that department".

Are Target employees really that much nicer? Its not like minimum and close to minimum wage employees don't hate their low paying job because they work at Wal-Mart vs. Target vs. any other retailer. How often do you see a happy cashier or floor representative?

I worked retail all through high school and college. I actually worked for a Wal-Mart brand (Sam's Club) for two summers and a Christmas break. The unique thing about my Sam's Club experience? That store had the worst loss prevention because the front end employees, including supervisors, had a scheme to steal massive amounts of product from the store. I'm not sure if I call that bitter, but that action is definitely not based on a high level of job satisfaction.

My point is, Wal-Mart needs to change their corporate business practices for people to view it as an acceptable place to shop. Treating their employees better is a start, but not the end solution to bring back alienated customers.

Limiting goof off time...

Why?
If you use Firefox, like I do, there are extensions created to help you eliminate fun non-productive time. Here are a few examples:
MeeTimer - MeeTimer logs where you spend your time online, grouping it into activities, and actively discouraging time wasting.
I have it running right now. Although it isn't really set up to group or annoy me, I am in no way discouraged to surf the internet.
LeechBlock - LeechBlock is a simple productivity tool designed to block those time-wasting sites that can suck the life out of your working day. All you need to do is specify which sites to block and when to block them.
This assumes your corporate firewall doesn't already block them.
TimeTracker - Do you spend too much time on Firefox? Do you open tabs faster than you can close them? Cannot get things done? Keep track of how much you browse with TimeTracker.
I think all of these look at the glass as half empty.

Here's an online gimmick:
Timer - a browser-based egg timer. Counts down however many minutes YOU choose. Displays the running time in the browser title bar (or tab).

Why should I limit my non-productive time? Non-work time is fun time! Instead, try to be more productive so you can have more time to fool around.
Some positive productivity extensions for firefox:
Life-hack productivity extensions
Life-hack GreaseMonkey scripts - between the two lists, this one is better...

Previously mentioned by Zach, Todoist, which I have started using and paying for, really does help. Simple, yet efficient.
Another tool mentioned by Zach, which has a Firefox extension, Getting Things Done.

There are many tools, add-ons, and what not out there to make yourself a better cubicle worker (Lifehack.org, Lifehacker.com)...why not take advantage so you can be less of a cubicle worker?

So you can do stuff like this:

PT Cruiser - Day 2

The alarm on my rental PT Cruiser continues to go off every time I unlock and open the driver side door. Terribleness....
Anyway, last night the PT lead me to Miscellaneous Rodriguez, a store in Sharonville, OH. Although the name sounds intriguing, the patrons are mainly Hispanic, probably because it sells mainly Hispanic food.

I was hoping they would sell something crazy like Japanese Pee Powered Batteries.....

Brain-Eating Amoeba

My mother originally sent me an article about this, but since the Chicago Tribune has yet to make all its content free like the New York Times (and possibly soon the Wall Street Journal), I have to use a different but similar article.
This article from azcentral.com, highlights the recent death of a 14-year-old boy from a brain-eating bacteria.
Yes, the bacteria "Naegleria Fowleri" can travel up your nose via nerve fibers and eat your brain. The most likely result of such action is death in two weeks. Usually, the bacteria is contracted from warm shallow water. An underwater somersault might result in the bacteria getting into your nose and eventually moving into your brain, destroying tissue as it goes.
Although only 23 people were infected from 1995 to 2004, there have already been six cases this year and experts predict that infections will increase due to rising temperatures and therefore warmer water (future decades).
Symptoms include "a stiff neck, headaches and fevers." At later stages, there will be "signs of brain damage such as hallucinations and behavioral changes."
Here's a link to a CDC fact sheet: LINK

Personally, I am not a huge fan of bodies of water. This doesn't encourage me to go jump in a lake. This bacteria can also be found in swimming pools. That's not cool either.
Either way, I though it was interesting and slightly scary. I don't want a bacteria to turn my brain into an Old Country Buffet....

Kevin Federline vs. Britney Spears

As you may have seen by now, Britney Spears loses custody of her children, Sean Preston and Jayden James, at noon on Wednesday. It is (at the time of this writing) Breaking News on CNN.
So, in honor of Britney being a total screw up, I figured I would do a quick comparison in a few categories to determine which parent should have the honor of raising two children who will clearly be messed up no matter what.

	k-Fed		Britney	WINNER
Upbringing	Parents divorced at age 8.		I think her parents are still together.	Britney
Previous Parenting Experience	Has spread his seed previously…has two other children via Shar Jackon.		Sean and Jayden are her first two children.	Kevin
Parenting skills	Shar claims he is a great dad.		Britney is infamous for a few stunts with her children, including holding one on her lap while driving. She was also ordered by a judge to spend 8 hours a week with a parenting coach.	Kevin - Parenting coach? I didn't even know those existed. How do I get to be one?
Schooling	Dropped out of high school in 9th grade. Later got his GED		Not sure, but I bet she made it past 9th grade.	Britney - but no promises that I'm right.
Hit Songs	Clearly, k-Fed's best song was PopoZão, even though the CD did poorly. Go here for a sample.		In my mind, "...Baby One More Time" was her true classic.	Britney - although Kevin almost wins this category since PopoZão is a slang term for "big ass".
Sports	Participated in a few episodes of WWE's RAW. Rumor has it, people backstage actually liked him. I don't see how the crowd wouldn't want to see him get thrown around a ring.		Accomplished gymnast until the age of 9.	Britney - Being a former gymnast who was always told to be a wrestler, I have to go with Britney.
Movies	Appearance in "You Got Served".		"Crossroads".	Kevin - I didn't see Crossroads, but it could not have been good.
TV	Britney and Kevin: Chaotic, 1 vs. 100, CSI, Las Vegas, various others.		Britney and Kevin: Chaotic, SNL, Will and Grace, CNN, various others.	Kevin - Based on Britney's comment to Tucker Carlson on CNN, I have to give this one to Kevin.
Modeling	The line he modeled at Macy's was the top selling line.		She posed naked while pregnant.	I'm going to call this one a tie since I can't believe people would LIKE looking at k-Fed or a pregnant Britney.
Website	Has flash objects and music playing.		Is allowing fans to name her latest album, but other than that, her web site is terrible.	Kevin - obviously a great category to break the tie and determine who should have custody.

Obviously, some things I failed to mention that could have helped Britney were her hugely successful music career, Grammy Awards (although she also received a Razzie for worst song and actress and was nominated for some others), record breaking album sales, very popular line of fragrances, and other accomplishments...
But, I didn't want Britney to win my intelligently crafted comparison. So, I agree with the judge. He did the right thing in giving the kids to everyone's favorite backup dancer, k-Fed.

WINNER = k-Fed

P.S. Britney destroys Kevin on GoogleFight...

*edited for elroy*
P.P.S. Britney has won the wikipedia battle. In the midst of her sobs and the sight of her children leaving for K-Fed's trailer, she managed to update her wikipedia page almost immediately. It's pretty amazing that she can do all that HTML while high on whatever she's on.

Financial Freedom

Having trouble getting the money you need to buy that new Cheverolet? Are you tired of paying 20% on that credit you used to buy your green Crocs? Were you one of the millions of suckas who got a neg am loan with a 1.00% teaser rate that you thought was going to be the rate for the life of you loan? IF YOU ARE....NOW THERE IS RELIEF.

You've seen him fight people in the ring...now the 'Nature Boy' Ric Flair is fighting for your finances!

Why not to travel with children...

In the security line at the Cincinnati airport last Thursday, there was a family of 5 a few spots in front of me. Although the video doesn't capture it as accurately as I had hoped, one of the kids was screaming bloody murder the entire time he was in the security line. I captured part of the madness right after TSA took the family out of the security line due to the disruption.



Before this, he had sat at the beginning of the line with his backpack extended into the feet of oncoming people, slapped his mother in the face, almost kicked his mother in the head, and continually screamed "Don't touch me!" and "Get away from me!" to his parents.

Money quote from the mother right after he slapped her in the face numerous times:
"Maybe he's still too young to travel with."

Sounds like a sweet kid...

This week's rental car....

This week, I flew into Dayton, OH. AVIS was kind enough to hook me up with possibly the worst looking type of car they could find....the PT Cruiser:


This is a picture of the actual car I am driving. Also, the remote doesn't work and the alarm randomly went off twice this morning, once before and once after breakfast. The only way I knew to stop it was to start the car. But, first I looked like an idiot for 30 seconds while pointing the key at the car and mashing buttons on the remote. I went from a Chrysler 300 with Sirius, last week, to this. It is embarrassing to drive.....

Big Ern's "Pop and" Locks of the Week

Next week's title: "Big Ern's 'Running out of Puns' Locks of the Week".

After going cold turkey on the favorites last week, it's time to put one tentative foot down off the wagon.

Enjoy.

SAN FRANCISCO +2.5 over Seattle
New England -8 over CINCINNATI
Tampa Bay +3 over CAROLINA

Last week: 2-1
This year: 4-4

Villager With Wheel Crew...

Here we are, last weekend, at Electronic Vagrant's Hawaiian luau themed east coast wedding celebration...



From left: EV, ACOM, Zach, Elroy

Re: Get Rich With Big Ern

For a better way to track Zach's investment progress, I suggest he sign up for one of two (or both) sites that allows people to track investments online:
Cake
Covestor

Please refer to my previous post for more info.

I signed up for both, but Covestor was the only one I could (manually, they did it) import my portfolio into. I have 5 invites to Covestor if anyone wants one, otherwise, I submitted my e-mail and received an invite the next day.
If you'd like to track my investments on Covestor (you have to sign up and have your portfolio imported first): tarfelroy

Another cool thing about Covestor, if Zach used it, is the option to add Blog Widgets. So, Zach can add widgets that highlight the stocks he just bought. Or, to prove to us he is a credible investor, he could have added a widget with his investment record.
Two examples of widgets (stocks I actually own):



Obviously, one I am doing well on and the other I am not. I am long on both of these stocks and with my current strategy, will sell them in about 3 months (gain or loss).

I'm not blogging about investment advice in this post, just adding my suggestions about how to effectively communicate investments and track investment history. Good luck, happy investing.

DISCLAIMER: If Covestor turns evil, steals all your info and your money, don't blame me.

Get Rich with Big Ern

At this point, I assume you've read The Secrets of My Success and committed the fool-proof rules to memory. Considering the hot hot heat that post generated, I'm going to blog my next few stock transactions and watch the praise/bile roll in.

Today's number one stunner is AT&T (NYSE:T). I bought in at 42.25 a few minutes ago, after it dropped $0.58 this morning. Classic example of "good company on a bad day". (I hope.)

Remember kids, we're only in this for the short haul (1-2% gain, hopefully next week). So, if you haven't signed up for Zecco and their commision-free trades, I would do that. Immediately.

Also, if I'm violating SEC rules by saying "buy this, it's going to go up". I hope someone will let me know before they kick in Nate's door and put him (and his cats) in Gitmo.

In the name of disclosure (and evaluating my wicked good judgement), right now I am holding:

• American Software, Inc. (AMSWA)


• AT&T (T)


• Exelexis (EXEL)


• Scholastic (SCHL)

Good luck, hopefully I'll see you at the boat showroom.

The Urinal Paradox

Like many of you, I work in a nondescript office, in a nondescript job. I'm not complaining, I'm just saying that the big issues of the day might not be geopolitics or negotiating a 30 million dollar order of sprockets. Well, I've come to you my fellow readers to help resolve the big office issue of the day. Who am I kidding, I'll be lucky if I get one or two of my fellow VwW bloggers to respond.



I will start by saying there is an unwritten man code that defines how we use the restroom. Some of you may have played this game before. It is a good summary of the decisions we must make every time we enter the restroom. This leads to the problem I have. The restroom has a three urinal setup with the little urinal dividers which are great for that extra privacy. The first two urinals are ordinary, but the third one is kid sized.

That leaves the question:
Does it make me any less manly if I use the kid urinal if someone is occupying the preferred urinal #1 location?
Do the mini-walls make it okay for me to crowd #1 and use full size #2 because we already have a personal space divider?

Also, if by chance the building manager is reading this, please put scales in the bathroom. Betting on poop size really makes the day go by faster.

Dwight, you ignorant slut!

This is a friendly reminder that tonight, 9pm ET/8pm CT, is the season premiere of the greatest show on television.

I know, I may have to defend myself against a few raving lunatics who say that The Wire, 24, House, or Entourage takes the cake (or in Zach's case: The View), but I stand firm.

See you in Scranton.

Todoist is the Truth

Over the last month or so, I've played with a few online productivity/task list tools (Tracks, GTDTracks, Vitalist) and they all have come up a little short for me.

I've used Todoist for the last 2 weeks or so and, like Jordan Bratman, I don't think I'm going to do much better than this.

A few of the things I like about it:

Clean Interface
After hiding the info page with one click, all you see are your tasks, projects, and a minmalist search window. No clutter on the screen.

Dates/Times
Maybe the coolest feature. Tired of clicking around in Outlook, setting a deadline for something that has to be done tomorrow by noon? I'm not going to check (it takes too long), but I'd guess it takes at least 12 clicks in several different date, time, scheduling boxes. In todoist you just type "tomorrow @ 12", "friday @ 12", or even "tom @ 12". Schedule recurring tasks by putting an "every" or "ev" in front of the date. I defy you to set up a recurring task in any other system with fewer key strokes than "ev 15" (Every 15th of the month) or "ev mon" (every Monday).

Contexts
If you're practicing your GTD mantra, or just sorting things out, you can add contexts to your tasks by simply adding "@home", "@work", etc... to the task description. Unlike GTDTracks and Vitalist you can add multiple contexts to tasks you can get done either at home or in the car, or wherever.

Prioritization
Similar to adding contexts, adding priorities is simple. "!p1" makes the task a top level priority, "!p2" a second level priority, and so on. There are 4 levels, each color coded.

Keyboard Shortcuts
Along with dates, the keyboard shortcuts are what really make Todoist stand out. Adding tasks, promoting and demoting tasks and projects, sorting, and much more can be done with shortcuts.

Launchy/iGoogle/Integration
Adding the Todoist DLL to your Launchy program folder allows you to add tasks to todoist using Launchy. 'Nuf said. I haven't used the iGoogle widget yet, but I imagine it works wonderfully. A Firefox extension for g-mail lets you send e-mails directly to your task list. And so on. There are Quicksilver and Mac Dashboard plug-ins and widgets, but, like Pony Parties (definately not linking to that, look it up yourself), I won't admit to knowing anything about how they work.

Chaining
I haven't done much chaining (a la Seinfeld), but it is equally easy to implement.

Price
It's $3 per month for the premium level. That gets you SSL, reminders (MSN, Jabber, Twitter, chaining, and other labeling capabilities. You probably spend at least $3/month on plastic silverware, replacement earring backs, and contraception. Todoist is more important than any of those things. Just think how quick it will be to type "[Ctrl-A] Go to planned parenthood, take care of it [Tab] tom @ 8".

What's Missing

There is not (or I have not found) iCal or RSS functionality.

Anyways, I've enjoyed using it, sign up, get your act together, then comment and tell me how smart I am.

Social Networking Aggregation...

I previous posted on social networking aggregation, so to follow up, I present Fuser. Fuser (which is still in beta) aggregates Facebook, MySpace and e-mail (pop and imap) all in one place. If you use both social networks and have an e-mail account or two, you can view them all in one central location.
You can reply within Fuser. You can view which social network friends communicate the most on your "leaderboard". It is free and may be useful to you. Check it out.

Here's a link to the story on TechCrunch:
LINK

Pet Obesity...

I know this news isn't really new, but there is a growing weight problem...in pets. This CNN article highlights that in 2005, 60% of pets were overweight. Compare this to 66% of humans who were overweight in 2004.
Do you see a correlation? I know I'm not the first to point this out.

According to the article, pet owners are sensitive about the weight problem of their pets. If you call their pets fat, they might get mad.

And go figure, extra weight leads to health problems!
Under the section entitled, "Why so fat?", money quote:
"As with humans, excessive portions are a main cause of the weight problem."

Kinda like how ACOM feeds our cats...he just pours as much food as possible into the bowl, like he is going on a trip and won't be back for a few days. He is secretly (or not so secretly) trying to fatten them up.

The article then talks about ways to slim your pet's weight down:
Increase Exercise
Control Portions
Control Quality

Seeing as how all of this advice could be applied to humans, I wonder if people with overweight pets who are overweight themselves apply the above tactics and also lose weight. Although, changing your dog or cat's food does not necessarily imply you start eating better.

How to know if your pets are fat:
1) Run your hands across the chest of the dog or cat. You should always be able to feel their ribs but not see them. There should never be a layer of fat over the ribs.
2) Look at the standing dog or cat from a bird's eye view. They should have what looks like a waist that tucks in right in front of the hips.

How to know if you are fat:
Same as the above, except apply it to your body.



As a side note on human obesity, I think the Body Mass Index (BMI) is somewhat garbage. It doesn't take into account a person's shape. I know that may sound ridiculous, but according to the chart below, I am overweight (and teetering towards obese). I am 5'4" and about 165 pounds. But, I am by no means almost obese. According to the CDC, "BMI is used because, for most people, it correlates with their amount of body fat."


Definition of overweight and obese, which correlates to the chart:

An adult who has a BMI between 25 and 29.9 is considered overweight.
An adult who has a BMI of 30 or higher is considered obese.


The map at the top of the post shows the percentage of obese people in each state. It was taken from a study done earlier this year.

Wanted: Slightly Curved Wall and Insane Friends

Stolen from Sports Illustrated this morning, I found a wonderful article about the world's craziest sports. Knowing a few of our readers, I know you're probably asking yourself, "how can I set up some of these competitions at my school/home/church?" Well, I have no idea, but I'm game to try almost any of them.

I'm thinking that a cross between the Eton Wall game and Buzkashi would be a riot. I'm even looking into a corporate sponsor.

Finally the lawyers come through...

Harvard lawyers have denounced the Harvard bookstore's pratices of throwing students out and calling the cops on them.

Its about time. Link to the article:
LINK

Change our blog name to villager with (one) wheel(ed) self-balancing skateboard?

Maybe not, but someone made a one wheeled self-balancing skateboard at Arizona State University. I felt it was appropriate to post on it due to the (sorta) similarity to our blog name....minus the villager part...ok, minus pretty much everything by the word wheel....

Link to the article:
LINK

GoogleFight

I love Google, but this site isn't actually associated with Google. googlefight.com merely uses Google search and compares the results of two criteria that the user enters. There is a quick stick figure fight and then it shows the results of both words or phrases to proclaim a winner.

For example, between this blog and a blog we link to (Through the Eyes of RWPACE), we won.
Between another blog we link to, (Frank M Owen), we lost big time.

I read about this site on a few different blogs and thought it would be a quick time waster...enjoy!

Harvard Bookstore ridiculousness continues...

In a previous post, I highlighted how the Harvard bookstore was kicking students out for writing down textbooks ISBNs in the store.
Apparently, they have taken it one step further. Now, they are calling the cops on students instead. Seriously?

According to the article, the two officers let the students continue to copy down ISBNs for two and a half hours before the students left on the own. The Cambridge Police Department said it removed three of four males, but that hasn't been confirmed by any of the students collecting data.

Where are the Harvard Law School students to bring the bookstore back to earth?

Link to the summary in Boing Boing:
LINK

So You Think You've Got It Rough?

At least you don't work in an Indian chromite mine.

I'm a big fan of this National Geographic photo set of the 10 Most Polluted Place on Earth. It's reassuring to see most of these mines being worked by children. That kind of smog can really play hell on an older person's lungs.

Female "Ninjas" Rob Gas Station...

Thanks to the watchful eyes of our friend, Nino Brown, I was informed of this article detailing a robbery by sword point.
Yes, as the title of the post says, two women, dressed up as "ninjas", one carrying a sword and one carrying a dagger, held up a Richland Township (PA) gas station. I assume this happened on Friday night since the article was posted on Saturday morning. Although I don't doubt the validity of this statement, the police chief was quoted as saying, "Swords, daggers could be used to seriously harm victims, so this is a very serious crime." But, you have to admit the whole concept is comical.

The "ninjas" tied up the clerk and stole cash, cigarettes, and lottery tickets.
Now, I'm not sure how the lottery system tracks its tickets, but it would seem that if they were smart, they would know exactly which tickets are at which stores. Perhaps there is a range of ticket numbers for each store. If this were the case, I'm not sure how the so called "ninjas" are going to use the tickets. I guess they could have friends use them, but it would seem like someone would get caught. Maybe the ticket tracking isn't that involved...
Also, cigarettes? Ninjas shouldn't smoke. They need to be in excellent physical condition to be sneaking around and killing people all the time (apparently, this clerk was very lucky). Someone should tell them that cigarettes will just slow them down...

The owner of the bar across the street is quoted at the end of the article:
"It's shocking. Things like that just don't happen out here. I just can't believe it happened."
What a dumb quote for an article. Like we hear about "ninjas" robbing convenient stores in other parts of the country. It doesn't happen out there? People usually don't dress up as ninjas and rob stores anywhere else in the country either....

For more information on how ninjas actually behave, please refer to the ultimate internet source for ninja Q&A, askaninja.com.

The Secrets of Other People's Success....

Or the not so secret secrets?
I'm not even sure if that makes sense....

Along the lines of Zach's hotly debated post about investing, in Fred Wilson's A VC blog, there was a post discussing online social/web financial services. The post mentioned Mint (which Zach and I both signed up for and have started playing around with), Wesabe, Geezeo, and Buxfer.
He also highlights two social/web financial services sites that track your online brokerage accounts, Cake and Covestor. Then, you can share your trades with others as well as see what other people are doing in the market. I'm assuming there are people who share their trades to the public and others who require you to be in their network to see their activity. Just a guess.

Either way, it is an interesting idea. Here is the link to the original post: A VC

I think I might sign up for one or both and check it out....

UPDATE: Covestor requires you to apply (which I did) and Cake doesn't support my brokerage yet (optionsXpress). So, I guess I'm on hold for these accounts...

Big Ern's "Full Nelson" Locks of the Week

The full nelson is probably what your girl friend/mistress has you in because we (we're losing money together now, you and I are a "we") lack the courage to bet any underdogs in a league where they're 17-12-3 this season.

We all like betting favorites, after all, they're supposed to win. Unfortunately, they won't win us our 92' yachts.

Therefore, it's time to grow a pair. The week 3 edition of "Locks" features all underdogs:

• Detroit +5 @ Philadelphia
• New York Giants +4 @ Washington
• Dallas +3 @ Bears
  

Record last week: 1-2
Record this year: 2-3

More Google usefulness...

Google now has an area for "Shared Stuff".

You need to add a bookmarklet to your toolbar and then you can share links through your Shared Stuff page. You can view other people's Shared Stuff. People can subscribe to your Shared Stuff in an RSS feed.

This kinda falls in line with my post about how I wish Google Reader allowed users to add comments to shared articles. This is close, except it is posted to your Shared Stuff page as opposed to your shared Google Reader feed.

There is currently a "Share" button in Google Video, but I'm sure they will expand it to other areas...

Re: The Secrets of Zach's Success

Because I can, instead of commenting, I will reply in a post.
As someone who also dabbles in the market, although not too much lately, I will agree and disagree with a few of Zach's points.

1. I completely agree with taking your money and running. I would agree that you cannot be greedy. Pick a return you want and stick with it. But, here is where my logic is a bit different...to make playing the stock market worthwhile, you need to have a better return on your investment than what the current high yield savings account/CoD/mutual fund would be. Basically, you need to beat your alternative investment. My USAA high-yield savings account last month was at 4.74% APR. So, if I don't make at least that in the market, there would be no point in me playing.

2. Losses are not for losers, mainly because the longer you wait for that stock to come back up, the less your return on your money over time. If you make that 1% after 3 months, then it totally wasn't worth it. So, set the amount (%) you are willing to lose and get out. If you hold a loser, you lose the potential to continue your strategy with other stocks (whatever that may be).

3. Research can definitely help. I lost a while back because I did not follow the research I did. I knew a drug company had a report about a clinical trial and I knew it potentially wasn't going to go well. I did not dump the stock the day before the report, like I should have, and it took a big dive. This also applies to earnings reports. The general consensus is to not hold over when a stock reports its earnings. Even if they have a positive earnings report, it still may not have a positive impact on the stock. Buy on rumor, sell on news.

4. Some say buy low sell high. Some say buy high sell higher. I'm not recommending either way, but like Zach said, pick a strategy and stick to it. In this sense, I disagree with picking up a stock after bad news, like Zach suggested. It may work if you're only looking for a 1% return. But, I would recommend NOT trying to pick a market bottom or top (or in this case stock bottom or top). If this was possible, then everyone would make money in the market, every time. But, unfortunately, everyone does not.

Personally, I use optionsxpress.com, which has fees, so it makes it harder to follow Zach's strategy due to the fixed costs of commissions. The more money you play with, the less impact commissions have on you return. The opposite is also true, hence my problem.

And perhaps I am a bit more conservative in my approach. When I was in high school, I played strictly options and did well. But, at that time the market was good. Now, when I play the short term, I tend to write covered calls to try and get a little more of a return.

Currently, I am following a long term strategy and haven't been doing anything short term. At some point, I really have to start paying attention.

Please do not take my advice too seriously, these are my opinions and my opinions alone. If you take my advice and do poorly in the market, I am not responsible.

The Secrets of My Success

I've been doing the online brokerage thing for a few months, and things are going suspiciously well. Thanks to Zecco and their comission free trades, I'm up 14.35% over 123 days (.336 years) on one account and 11.10% over 98 days (.268 years) on another. I've been "managing" (I use the term loosely) both accounts similarly, and both those numbers both extrapolate to 41-43% annual returns.

In a year marked with hedge fund and real estate misery, why are things going so well for me? I'm not asking this in the rhetorical-arrogant way, more the suspicious-waiting-for-the-other-shoe-to-drop way.

My basic assumptions going in. Theyre both gambling related. Stick to what you know.

1. Stocks are like roulette, but since things tend to go up, the odds are slightly in your favor instead of slightly against you.


2. The dice do have a memory, i.e. what happened before is indicative of what will happen in the future.

With these assumptions in mind, I present the Big Ern Rules for Make Benefit Glorious Nation of Boat Filled Retirement:

1. Take the Money and Run - A) As soon as you see a 1-1.5% gain, slide in a stop or trailing stop order to protect your gains. B) As soon as your high flyer starts to level off, sell that mother. A 1 or 2% gain over a few days is awesome, especially with no fees.


2. Buy Good Companies on Bad Days - This goes against my bandwagoning instincts, but seeing headlines like "CostCo Stock Drops 4% Due to Heat" should get you fired up. The sun will come up. Probably tomorrow.


3. Don't Take Stock Picks from Anyone You Know - If the pick goes up, you become dependent, if it goes down you get bitter. Man is not an island, but the man who owns (or will own) an island doesn't need a hot pick from his cousin's neighbor's nephew.


4. Don't Do Any Research - Research is for the weak. Find a stock rating tool you like, and use it. What the hell is a P/E ratio anyways?


5. Losses are for Losers - Never give up until a stock shows a gain. This is the one that worries me. Thus far even when things have dropped precipitously after I bought them (Level Three, Raytheon, Exelixis, Scholastic, even Apple once), I've held on and they eventually (a month or so) come back up to show a small profit. (Note - I'm still waiting on Exelixis and Scholastic.) As soon as you see that small profit, see Rule 1.

Here are (some of) the possible flaws in my genius:

1. Eventually one of the stocks I refuse to unload will clean me out. If I started this 8 years ago, I'd still be holding the Enron I bought at $90.


2. The last few months are an anomalous period and the guidelines I'm using will fail me over the long run.

I'd love to hear other reasons why I'll eventually end up living in a van down by the river.

Apple is up 2% today. Off I go...

When people take their jobs too seriously...

According to Boing Boing, an assistant managing editor of the Wall Street Journal was detained at a Kmart (who would have thought they'd still be in business?) and accused of stealing. Well, she was accused of putting more expensive shoes ($24.50) in a box for less expensive shoes ($16.50). After walking out the door, she was confronted by a security guard and led to a windowless room in the back of the store. They held her for an hour questioning her...
Here's a link to the original article: ARTICLE
Here's a link to an MP3 podcast interview: INTERVIEW

I have a few (obvious) questions....

1. What is an assistant managing editor doing shopping at Kmart?
I know titles can be misleading, but managing editor sounds impressive, so assistant managing editor sounds almost as impressive. Maybe she is a glorified administrative assistant, but it seems like she could afford at least Target, maybe even Ross, or definitely Marshall's.

2. What happened to giving people the benefit of the doubt?
I understand that $8 times a lot of people pulling this "ticket switching" type of stealing amounts to many lost green backs, but couldn't they have just asked her to pay the difference of her mistake? Did they think she was going to run to her car (with the rest of her family) and peel out of the parking lot? I'm sure she would have just paid the $8 plus tax and apologized for her error.

3. Coming back to the title of my post, did the rent-a-cop security guards really need to question and accuse her of stealing for an hour?
For $8, wouldn't a more valuable use of their time have been watching for other possible thefts? They wasted the company's money by being on the clock and questioning her unnecessarily, not to mention the potential loss of merchandise since they were understaffed in the loss prevention department.

I have worked in retail and understand loss prevention, but I think they went a bit overboard. Just like Eletronic Vagrant hates Wal-Mart, I will now hate and boycott Kmart. Their revenue just decreased a total of $0, because I never shop there, but I encourage all of you not to shop there also. I wonder if the domain kmart-sucks.com is available for purchase...

Werewolf Syndrome...

I realize this story is a week old (online), but I just saw this on TV. Apparently, there is a condition called hypertrichosis, "which causes [the] body to produce an abnormal amount of hair everywhere". So, hence the picture on the right side of this post. This picture doesn't do what I just saw on TV justice. He was much hairier, so he obviously shaved his face for this picture.

A bit more info...genetics:
"Genetic research has linked the condition to the X chromosome. That means if a woman carries the gene, she has a 50-50 chance of passing it on to her offspring, whether she has a boy or a girl. If a male carries the gene, 100 percent of his female children will be affected, but none of his sons."

A bit more on why it may have happened:
"We believe that this is a gene which was functioning a long time ago in the evolution of man when primates were becoming men,"..."as humans evolved, certain genes that were unnecessary for survival mutated and were turned off. Figuera believes that, in Danny's family, the gene for hypertrichosis was somehow accidentally turned back on."
So, evolution took a step backwards in this case...

If you want to read more about the hard lives of Danny (pictured) and his brother Larry, about how they started out in a cage featured in a freak show, about how they went from that to (and are currently in) a Mexican circus (is anyone shocked by this fact?), or about how Danny has children and a girlfriend who is down with his hairiness, go to the ABC News Article.

If they post video or I find any online, I will definitely post a link to it. Or please add a link in the comments if anyone finds video on it.

He really does look like a werewolf....

UPDATE: I found a video on YouTube, not from ABC, but on the same family.

Cruziero ta foda!

So, there is a kid named Kerlon who plays for a soccer team in Brazil who has patented what is called the seal dribble. Needless to say, he tried it at the end of a match recently. His team was winning....there were only a few minutes remaining....and he was playing against his intercity rivals.

BAD MOVE


The uproar that has ensued is sweeping through soccer-crazed Brazil. You can read about it here if you like. Or, if you can't read Portuguese, you can go here.

My take:
1. Showing up professional athletes that would like nothing more than to break your shins is not a good idea.
2. Point number one is even more pertinent when you are about 5'7 and weigh about 130 pounds.
3. The seal dribble is possibly a career ending move every time it is completed. It will always end with the same thing, Kerlon screaming on the ground and someone getting a yellow card (at least) You can't really say that about any other play this side of the chop block unless you're Zach, and you think the Broncos linemen just happen to often fall down at the knees of opposing defensive linemen.
4. I really wish there would have been a microphone there to record what the defenders were screaming at him
5. I hate his team. The intercity rival, Clube Atletico Mineiro is the best team in the world.

Harvard bookstore throwing out students...

...for taking too many notes. They don't want them to learn?
The article (from Boing Boing) highlights how students are taking copious notes about the prices of books at the campus bookstore. Apparently, the nerds up at Harvard like to take notes before they even own the book....
But, seriously, if they write down the book info, such as the ISDN, they are being booted from the store because the Barnes and Noble run bookstore says the prices are its "intellectual property". I'm sure I don't have to tell anyone that it seems like a totally invalid claim.

Maybe if they lowered their prices, they wouldn't have students writing down the book information and then buying it online for cheaper, either new or used. College bookstores are a notorious rip off. I think I bought one book my second semester sophomore year and paid someone a few bucks to borrow some of the other ones.
The article highlights a website that shows the books for Harvard courses:
crimsonreading.org

Either way, half.com or Amazon work too.

Online Financial Tools

I've been putting off signing up for a one-size fits all online financial tool like Mint or Wesabe. Have any of you dummies used one of these and had noteworthy experiences?

I suppose there's always the security risks of putting all your financial information in one place, but once a sketchy Panamanian waiter takes your Amex out of site to settle your tab/order his new Segway Skateboard, why sweat the small stuff?

W&M grads theive from GMU...

I guess AV nerds still go to William and Mary, but they don't graduate and make enough money to buy their own stuff:
LINK

Not only did they steal from George Mason, but they may have also nicked equipment from Duke and Elon.

Does anyone know these guys?



Thanks to Brendan for the link.

TSA is terrible....

I shouldn't use broad generalizations, but since I travel almost every week, I really do think TSA airport security is terrible. I won't go in to my own personal experiences of lax and slow government employees, because this blog post takes the cake. I stole the photo for my post from that link. Basically the blogger (accidentally) carried box cutters onto an airplane. The photo sure looks like an airplane bathroom. I know photos can be doctored, but I don't doubt this actually happened.

In TSA's defense, a lot of the airport employees are part time, which minimizes their benefits, and they are the armpit of the organization. But still, they could attempt to use their brains here and there...

Also, Electronic Vagrant e-mailed this link out the other day concerning TSA, which I thought was interesting:
kiphawleyisanidiot.com


UPDATE: Here's a really, really long blog post about TSA ruining lives, LINK.

GodTube

After highlighting JewTube in a previous post, I feel it is only appropriate that I chronicle another YouTube clone:
GodTube

According to DownloadSquad , the site is "Basically whatever YouTube's got, but with a strange religious twist." The CEO of the site claims that "Jesus 2.0 is the wave of the future". GodTube had a 973% month on month growth in August. It had 3 million unique visitors. Basically, the audience of this blog, times about a million....give or take....

Link to the article:
LINK

Here is a sample video based on the popular Mac vs. PC commercial series:

Twitter can no longer be denied...

I've been trying to ignore it...pretend it didn't really exist...pretend I didn't really care....but I've been lying to myself.
This is a call for everyone to join Twitter.

Reasons to join:
1) Community Twitter - communities of like employment or like minds that are Twitter friends. An example would be Alley Insider. Alley Insider is an online blog about New York digital business. Through this website, you can join the Alley Insider Twitter community and keep up with others who care about issues that the website deals with.

2) Launchy and Twitter - Launchy is a Windows program that is meant to replace your start menu, much like Spotlight (or Quicksilver) on Mac OS X. The combination of these programs allows you to do the following:
Update Remember the Milk
Post to Google Calendar
Set SMS reminders
Twitter from Launchy - Link to the instructions

3) Follow blogs - An example is Download Squad, a site I've mentioned previously. You can "friend" the website on Twitter and follow along.
Link

4) I keep reading about people using Twitter who are older than me. That scares me and makes me think I'm missing out. Although I use Facebook, I was not in college when it became popular, so I'm not constantly on the site. So, when I read about people not younger than me using Twitter, it makes me think it could be useful.

Here is a beginner guide to Twitter.

I need some friends on Twitter. Here is the link to my twitter page:
LINK

Also, just like DownloadSquad, you can follow this blog on twitter at this link.

Happy twittering.

Yahoo! Mash?

Although I read about this a few day ago, I'm still flabbergasted that Yahoo! has created a social networking site, Yahoo! Mash. According to the review by Download Squad, Yahoo! Mash has similar features to MySpace and Facebook. They will even be opening up a 3rd party development platform (like Facebook did) in the next few months.
One interesting note from the review...friends can start pages for each other to invite them to join the service.

But still, does the web really need another social networking site?

What we need (and I have read about) is a social networking site to combine social networking sites....

IBM protest in Second Life...

Second Life "is an Internet-based virtual world." Second Life users can "interact with each other through motional avatars, providing an advanced level of a social network service combined with general aspects of a metaverse. Residents can explore, meet other Residents, socialize, participate in individual and group activities, create and trade items (virtual property) and services from one another."

Apparently IBM decreased salaries in Italy and employees aren't happy. So, what are these angry employees going to do? Naturally, they are going to protest at the IBM facilities in Second Life, where IBM has a large corporate campus and marketing site. If you click on the link to IBM, you may even see some avatars from Second Life.

So, will this actually be effective? I guess the huge advantage to this is that employees can potentially strike while they are at work (being paid). I would think the problem with striking is that the money the employees lose in the immediate term for not working takes a while to make up with the (potential) wage increase obtained due to the strike.
Although, apparently there is an Italian strike. During this type of strike, employees come to work and do their jobs, but don't do any more than the minimum. So, perhaps this Second Life strike can be classified as an Italian (or work-to-rule) strike.

Either way, does IBM even care if computer generated beings that represent real people are striking in a virtual world?

Cat video...

Since I don't have anything to post about at the moment, you can watch one of my cats attack a fork. This is the semi-obese cat, thanks to over-feeding by ACOM. He talked about doing it right after we got them and he hasn't stopped since. But, it backfired because she lays on his lap like there is no tomorrow...



Notice the other cat in the background laying in an amazon box...she loves cardboard...

Big Ern's "John" Lockes of the Week

A being "conscious of pleasure and pain, capable of happiness or misery, and so is concerned for itself," would never bet Joey Harrington on the road. We live (if we didn't put the kidney transplant money on the Falcons), and hopefully we learn.

We've also learned that, while no one is perfect, 50% doesn't cut it (unless you're the one taking the bets). Hence the 3 pick serving size from here on out.

This weeks picks:

• Seattle (-3) @ Arizona
• Chicago (-13) vs. Kansas City
• Dallas (-4) @ Miami

Next week's lesson: The folly of picking road favorites in the NFL.